parenting bullies

Parenting Bullies

 

Since I started my facebook page that goes along with this blog I have seen so many different views on parenting. Not only views but ideas from different parents that have caused literal fights over the internet. I am just a bit distraught by this. I understand everyone has their opinion on how to raise children. I feel you are entitled to that opinion as long as it isn’t morally wrong or puts the child in danger. We are all humans and we are unique. No one can agree on the same thing every time. Let’s just look at a few of these issues that have brought about war between the mommies.

BrestfeedingI just don’t understand what the fuss is about. There is so much controversy and debate over this issue. Boob or bottle? I myself think that breastfeeding is awesome. I did not do it with my first two because I was young and no one really encouraged me. With my third I tried and I tried and no matter what there was no latching on. The nurses tried, the lactation specialist tried, I tried. After defeat I just cried. I felt like such a loser. With mittens I was determined to be a breastfeeding mama. Right after I had her they placed her on my chest skin to skin and with no trouble at all she latched right on like a little champ. It was beautiful! Here comes the problems we face with this issue. You have your die hard breast feeding groups that will push it in your face so hard that you feel if you don’t do it your not a good mother. That is not true. Yes breastfeeding is the best way to give your baby nutrition if it works properly and there are no problems. Some women just cannot produce milk…or enough milk. I have heard this story and it is heartbreaking for moms who truly try and just cannot. If the baby isn’t gaining weight then it is not the best idea….formula will be okay! Millions of babies survive on formula. On the opposite end of the spectrum you have your naysayers who are just chomping at the bit to put you down for exposing your milk maker in front of them (even if it is concealed fully). What is wrong with these people who think a child nursing it’s mother is pornographic? Oh please you people probably do have a ass load of porn stored away in secret drawers in your home and this is your way to come off as an innocent by standard. Please….there is absolutely nothing wrong with a mom feeding her child so get over it.

disposable vs. cloth diapers Come on now!! Are you really going to judge me on whether or not I place my baby’s sweet bottom in easy peasy disposable diapers or little more work cloth diapers? I understand you want a better environment and I am right there with you however my baby’s diaper isn’t going to do any more damage than that shit rolling out of the tops of factories or from beneath your car. I will admit it maybe I am lazy when it comes to this. Does that make you better than me just because you want to spend more time doing laundry than actually spending with the little dookie dropper? No. I praise you for your motherly “green” abilities but I have way too much shit (literally) going on in my household to worry about washing cloth diapers. Women if you do disposable you are still a great mother…do not let them break you down! jar baby food vs. make your own baby foodReally? No I am not committing child neglect just because I don’t use the baby bullit and make my own fresh baby food. Who the hell has this kind of time? I would love to do it…if I could fit it in my schedule with the other 999 things I have to do today. Am I saying you are wrong for doing it? Heck to the no girl! You go right ahead. I am proud for you. If you have that much time and it is that important you can go aheah and whip up mittens enough to last her a few months… I will let you know though just because my child eats from Gerber and yours eats from mommy’s kitchen it does not make my child one brain cell short of yours.

co-sleeping Let me say all three of my girls have slept in bed with me…..they turned out fine. I had the joys of snuggling with my babies and keeping them safe. What is the big deal if I choose to have them in my bed? I just don’t get it. I worked for a doctor that hated it said it was just spoiling the children. Well heck yeah that’s what God gave them to me for. If I want to raise a spoiled brat I will…you are not the one that has to deal with them. Now if you choose to put your baby in a crib good for you! I wish I had the strength you do. I am just way to nervous to leave them in there all night. I would never sleep because I would be standing over the bed watching them breathe…just me.

Cry it Out This is the new controversy. All I have to say is NO. I think this is just wrong. It is cruel. I know you can’t pick them up on every whimper but come on…what kind of parent allows their baby to lay and scream for God knows how long. I don’t care what school you graduated from or how high your IQ is that is just the most non-caring, non-loving, and mean thing I can think of. How about “Ferber” we place you in a dark room, with a wet diaper, away from those you know and trust and just let you stay there. What if you are hurting and are unable to convey that to us since the only way you have is to cry? What if you are scared and need to be comforted? What if you get hungry and need to eat? What if you are a nervous baby and you are experiencing separation anxiety? Well, I won’t do it. I will not allow my wee one to cry it out. If that is the method you choose more power to you. Okay so that is just a few of the topics that will bring the bully out in the mommy. I have my opinions yes I do but that is just for my family. I am no expert and I can’t sit and tell you what is best for yours. Moms have an intutition about their children. We know when something is wrong or if our babies are happy and content. I don’t follow rules…I try to follow my intuitions and my logic. If my child is clean, fed, dry, and happy then you have no reason to doubt my parenting skills. Yes, I’m my own individual person and I believe in raising a happy healthy child. I also believe in the 5 second rule, I ate cat food as a kid and it didn’t kill me, I made mud pies in the back yard and yes I tried that also. I take a shower with my mittens and she loves it, I breastfed until I had no milk left (which is not my fault), I snuggle with my babies in my bed, and I believe in showing affection in front of my kids. It lets them know that mommy and daddy love each other and love them. I am not a perfect mom but I am the best mom in the world to my kids.

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